enoughsaid

Saturday, August 20, 2005

It's been a tough week. Juz had Exercise Spade and i can tell u frankly that it totally stressed mi out because of all the things that mi as a platoon sergeant have to settle. 2 nights before spade, they started to give out appointments to us for the exercise and i was relly shocked that i was appointed to be the exercise platoon sergeant which is something like the 2nd in charge of the platoon. Up till now i still dunnoe y i was given tt appointment because i was the platoon sergeant in company line and i was the only platoon sergeant that held appointment for both admin and the exercise..

And so we had to start settling the stores the next day and seriously its damn screwed up. As the platoon sergeant mi job is to ensure that everyone has all the stores and the platoon and section stores must be settled. As if the section stores are not enough to stress mi out, i still had to draw special optics and signal equipments for this exercise. We as appointment holders get to use night vision goggles, ace alarm system and binoculars as well as pen guns and to draw al lthese equipment, i had to keep on bothering the storemen because they're all relly damn blur and damn cock and here i am stressed out.

And so the night before the exercise which was a tuesday, both mi and mi platoon commander russell had to plan for the exercise and present it to the sirs..we both slept at about 3 and had to wake up at 5am to continue planning and settling the stores. Basically, timing was so tight and i'm expected to be everywhere everytime and everyone juz had to keep calling mi..the sirs, the cadets and so many instructions juz flying everywhere. And then we went for lunch..and i juz dunnoe y, i juz started to cry a little but of course not in the sight of anyone since i purposely ate faster..but i guess, i was still quite emotional and jianhong and gang noticed mi reddened eyes and quivering voice. Well, at that time i juz can't understand y God put mi thru all these shit. That was how stressed up i feel. Mi job was to delegate tasks, not do them miself but most of the time, i did them miself. Y? Was i selfish, tynk highly of miself?? No, it's because u juz had to look at the other pple's faces. They all look so shagged out, all so lethargic and i dun tynk most of them will be willing to help mi out. For mi closer frens there, i dun wanna keep on bothering them..so in the end, i did almost everything miself and tt screwed mi up totally.

Finally, the recce party left wing line for our defensive area which is at Rambutan Hill, near ocs at about 2pm. The main body joined us at about 4pm there. Unfortunately we juz managed to allocate the different digging positions for everyone before it cat 1-ed until 6+ and diggin only commenced at 7pm..we had to dig in the dark which was damn difficult and everyone was like so lethargic and unwilling to start.

Me and my platoon commander got scolded coz our primary objective was not to dig but to go around checking on pple's progress, pushing them to dig faster etc...and i got scolded again and again coz the comms path, the early warning device etc was not up to standard and the sirs had to keep talking to mi and at times, they even encouraged mi and talked to mi nicely and tell mi not to be so stressed up. But mi PC, lieutanent bernard seriously stressed mi out. He had to keep on scolding mi and correcting mi and tt put mi under a lot of stress. Mayb like they say, they wanted to put everyone under tremendous amount of stress to see if they can work well under stress, i guess i failed.

Everytime we had to do something, like collecting meals, returning the rubbish, help dig platoon hq and mg trench, i had to 'arrow' pple to do all these when i can do it since i'm digging less than them..but i was scolded...and i din settle the returning of the night snack although it was always on mi mind because it was so late at night..everyone was so tired out and still they had to dig and i had to get 4 pple to return everything...where to find 4 pple when everyone is so tired and busy and i din wanna arrow anyone..But i guess, the sirs thought i was some blur cock and keep forgetting everything and for tt i got screwed too..

Everytime i had to arrow pple to do tasks, i relly fail miserably when i juz so happened to glance at their faces..it made mi feel real bad and i guess no one can understand tt kinda feeling unless u're in mi shoes. Being kiaped in the middle by mi superiors and the concern i have for mi fellow frens..Another reason y i dun like asking pple to help is because some of them are not able to do the task well. Although mi and mi platoon commander have briefed the section commanders on where to place their rifle and sbo when they dig the fire trench, the msg was not passed down and for tt..i got screwed big time. Another example, while contructing the concertina wires, i asked 2 guys to bring out 2 monkey ramps from the area where our stores were kept. When concertina wires were set up and we went for dinner, i was called back and asked to keep all the stores. I was adamant that only 2 out of 3 monkey ramps on the floor belonged to mi but when i went back to check on the stores, i couldn't find the last piece of monkey ramp that was supposed to be at the pre-dump area...

Someone took out the last monkey ramp and i din even knoe...see? Because of all these mistakes, i always get screwed and screwed and screwed like nobody's business. Basically, everyone's fault is mi fault. If anybody loses anything, it's mi fault. If anybody dunnoe anything, it's mi fault. It's relly a shitty appointment job.

But i managed to survived on 4hr 15min of sleep in 4 days 3 nights although i often felt faint during the exercise. We started to recover all our stores and cover up our holes at about 10pm on thursday night and only finished and reached company line at about 5.30am on friday..and then we had to wake up at 7.45am..see? haha power or wad...

Unfortunately, our wing commander, was not happy wif every platoon's performance because alot of trenches were not completely dug and he said tt we missed the main objective which was to defend. that's y..he decided to send everyone for Spade 2..which is a repeat of the exercise next week. We were supposed to have a long weekend starting from fri night..but now, i tynk everyone will probably book out on sun morning..and i wun be able to book out at all since i'm on duty on sunday...sian...

Tt's all for mi now...take care everyone..pray for mi out there..pray that i wun fall man..

1 Comments:

  • At 3:00 AM, Blogger Reaper_9 said…

    yoz..dun worry la k? you've already been cps for lyk 2 wks? soon ur appointment will end la..haha..outfield appointment hopefully u oso dun need to do la..surely life'll be better soon..of coz anithin can ask me to help out la..dun worry abt it man..haha..

     

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